Irish Muscian looking for holiday gigs

I wasn't gonna reply to this thread, but SonderB is one of my favourite posters here and I feel obliged to drop him/her a line:-      As John Wayne would have said "I ain't no bright spark" but one or two Irish people with guitars glued to their backs have asked me the same question. My advice was that if your name ain't Presley, McCartney, Jones, Sinatra or even Bono keep on travellin' - You ain't gonna get rich doin' gigs in the Irish Rover, Ankara or on our Roof Terrace. And if I'm  payin' tax on my hard earned income, I expect you to do the same - Mojacar ain't no Tax Haven even for a cheesy C+W Blues Singer..

Thanks Matthew for the advise.Can I point out that 50% of the acts you mentioned are dead and the rest are well on their way to Nirvana. It conjurs up Mojacar as an Elephant Graveyard of International talent deceased. 

"Is that the real Elvis on stage?" Lord Lucan was heard to utter. Back from the dead by popular Mojacar demand. One wit was heard to say, Elvis dying, was a great career move.

How are these Idols from the past paid? Some say in "Plenary indulgences" though only if you're a Catholic. Think of them as a type of, Heavnly Trump Presidential Pardons. Non taxable as well. So a bargain for Carbon Neutral Mortal Sin washing.

Sinatra would need a barrel full to get him out and back to where ever he ended up. Just a rumour.

I'm looking forward to Keith Richards making a come back in the Irish Rover. when he does burn that youthful Dorian Gray Picture in his attic.

I hope Mojacar does'nt become a setting for another Tarintino epic, Dawn of the Musical Dead.

So Matthew gathering up all your wise words and adding my own twist. I need to tell my Irish Musician friend. That he first needs to get big, we are talking Las Vegas famous. And when he passes over and goes through the Pearly gates. Only then will he be allowed into the Management of Deceased Stars.In order to get a gig booked in Mojacar. (Needs a Dead accountant to handle the Pearly gates Tax issues!!!) 

And even then, Elvis would be a tough act to follow. (says Lord Lucan to his drinking companion Pablo Escobar)

As Buzz Light Beer once said about this forum. You get a lot of great advice, to help you, To Infinity and Beyond;-)

well before Brexit the GC were clamping down on entertainment even the odd game of bingo was stopped,it all started when they put the iron lady in charge of the ayuntemento

Is your friend a resident or visitor?

he may get lucky and get the odd gig but it will pay peanuts especially if under the counter money is involved

Best post I've seen in these parts in ages. Hints of James Joyce, Francis McManus, John B Keane and Oscar Wilde. In the interests of truth though I'd add nine tenths of the live acts in Mojacar are as near to dead as makes no difference. There was an Elvis impersonation competition in Tramore just before Covid and one guy showed up dressed as a skeleton singing You Ain't Nothin' but a Hound dog. It didn't go down well. 

"well before Brexit the GC were clamping down on entertainment even the odd game of bingo was stopped" - HartCJHart.

Jazus CJ, I wish I had been around when the raids were in full swing. Blue Rinse Brigade with their first love being Bingo being put under pressure. I'm glad I'm not a member of La Guardia Civil with the Provisional wing of the Blue Rinse Freedom Fighters seeking retaliation - trench warfare comes to mind. It may eventually be the one success of Brexit though.

While on the subject of tax avoiding little earners some Residentia holders might wish to know what are tax free investments (Govt Bonds etc) in the UK and Ireland may not be tax free in Spain - You heard it here first!!!!!!!! - And Revenue in UK and Ireland are obliged to furnish details to Spanish Revenue. 

Now this is where we Irish have the advantage over Mick-the-Brit, - We can have our Irish tax free investments in our Irish names (bet you didn't know all of us have Irish names as well as our English names and they are not similar). It ain't illegal to use your Irish name for such. 

would that also involve borrowing your neighbours cows when the tax inspector calls!!!!!

th GC had to beat a retreat when the blue rinsers started prodding them with their knitting needles

my brother liked a game of bingo while in Benidorm and the boss of the bar  after many numbers were called would say ;is anybody sweating;

1 night the GC came in halfway through a game and my brother shouted to the boss ;is anybody sweating;

Going totally off topic because Matthew did;-)

I remember there was a story in Ireland about a Polish guy called Prawo Jazdy, who was breaking every traffic law up and down the country. Speeding, illegal parking you name it, he was doing from one end of the Republic to the other. Could Prawo Jazdy, be the Irish equivelant of Keyser Soze!!!!!

Some bright spark started checking how this one guy, Prawo Jazdy, was up in court for all manner of law breaking but had never actually been charged, as he was always missing in action, a no show everytime.

It turned out the Garda where taking his name Prawo Jazdy direct from his Polish driving Licence.

And what they where actually writing down was the Polish word for "Driving Licence" which is Prawo Jazdy.

The EU type card, carries the words, "Prawo Jazdy," in large at the top with the actual name appearing underneath in somewhat smaller letters.

So this Country wide, Prawo Jazdy/Keyser Soze Crime spree, was just a cockup by the Garda.

As they say, you could not make it up;-)

I can attest that SonderB is absolutely correct. The things we Irish do to treat our immigrants better! We do the same for Brits with grandparents/parents born in Ireland and wish to wear a green jersey with a shamrock crest. And if you wish to come to Ireland we have bingo in the parish hall every Sunday night. Oh! As nobody else will give you one, we'll do everything we can to give you an Irish Passport too whether you were never in the country and even if you can't find Ireland on a map.